Introspective Journey

Back when I first arrived in India my friend Tam invited me to visit an astrologer with her. Knowing little about astrology, but always agreeing with the books I have glanced at that described characteristics and tendencies of particular zodiac signs, I was curious to see what my astrological chart would reveal.

It is impossible for me to not have some confidence in the predictions offered about my future when aspects of my past were so accurately described. He mentioned events I have endured that I have never told another living soul about. He brought up very specific relationships in my life and characterized them to a tee. He knew I lived in Africa in the mid-1990's, and pointed out that I was an artist but not one whose livelihood depended on my creative pursuits. All of this was done based on my date, time and location of birth -- nothing more.

Not sure how much merit to give to these predictions, yet certain not to disregard them (just in case), I have been having fun living my life as if I know how events are going to unfold over the next 14 months. Whenever an opportunity poses itself for me to take action to support the direction I have been prophesized, I do it, as I would be quite thrilled if it all works out according to my astrological plan.

The family I have been living with in Kashmir puts enormous stock in the predictions offered by their Sufi (Muslim guru), and during one of his recent visits encouraged me to ask him about my future. Wanting to see if his visions confirmed or contradicted those of the astrologer, I posed a few questions to him. Despite the fact that the sources used to read ones future are completely different, his visions not only concurred with that of my astrological chart but offered some specifics that I had not known before. Actually these extra details have raised the stakes as they have put the course of events on a "real time" table.

The predictions seem to make perfect sense considering the direction that my life is heading in, and the future it describes is very much aligned with the desires of my heart. In short, I can see myself living this future. Yet how I get from here to there, especially in the specified timetable, is beyond the scope of my imagination. So much so that all I can do is allow life to take its course.

On one side it is very comforting to know how things are going to work out over the next year +, as I do not have to expend energy pursuing paths that will mislead me. At the same time it is bizarre to take the wonder out of ones future. It is particularly challenging for a strategic planner like me to already know the certain outcomes of my 14-month plan, especially when I have no concept of the actual course to get there. Nonetheless, my brain can not help but start to envision the reality and begin planning for its arrival. All of these perspectives are buzzing around my head while a small shadow of a doubt lingers in order to ensure I am not disappointed if it does not materialize. Once again, I find myself in strange and unfamiliar waters.

If these predictions are true, I can not help but question if it is unnatural to know them ahead of time. It seems one could put forth efforts to derail their future if it is one they are not looking forward to, or in my scenario, one could get fixated on the future so much so that they could lose their ability to allow the course to occur naturally. Perhaps knowing ones future is such an inherent part of life in places like India, that comprehending how things will turn out is the natural order. But for me it feels like I know about my own surprise party which certainly changes the nature of the party. Although, if I take this metaphor a bit further, I realize that knowing only removes the element of surprise. Actually, ensuring the guest of honor is in knowledge of the plan does make it easier to facilitate the event, and a party is still a party.

With that in mind and without knowledge of the protocol for sharing one's predicted future with others, I am going to keep the details to myself, just to be safe. Besides, my plans may involve one of you and I do not want to take away your element of surprise as well. When it is all said and done we can confer with the family I have been staying with to confirm the accuracy of the predictions. I will let you all know when to yell surprise!!!